Monday, September 28, 2009

Who He is.. and Who I Want to Be.

When I read the words of Jesus and seek His heart I can't help but to feel his love for people. And I know Jesus loves all people, but His burden for the lost, the lonely and those in desperate places is so evident in His words and actions. I love that Jesus didn't die beside a charity worker or an Assemblies of God pastor. Jesus spent some of His last moments speaking to a thief. And what about that time He saved that woman's life knowing full well she was guilty of adultery? And when He calls us to take care of the widow, the fatherless and the prisoner? I don't think these are empty words. I don't think Jesus was just "throwing it out there." The compassion in those red letters grips my heart. I know God's grace, I have lived in it for most of my life. I know His love because I feel it, and I can't help but to want more than anything for those prisoners, those with broken hearts and broken lives to know this grace and love. I want that burden to consume me. I want the heart that Jesus so well demonstrated for us to guide my thoughts and actions. I want people to know that God is on their side!

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

In Your Hands Forever

When I read back to even how I felt last week it just amazes me how things change! It makes me so grateful that my God is a solid rock, never changing irregardless of my sometimes out of control feelings.
Every single person at this moment in their life is going through a season. In fact, *"Seasons were God's idea."He created them. He designed them. Each one for a specific purpose. I'm responsible to have the right attitude and do the right activities during this season of my life.

*quote from the pastor of the church I went to last week.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Surely It Can't All be Uphill from here

There is so much uncertainty in my life right now. If I knew what next week would bring, or next month maybe sitting here in the very same place I sat before I "went out into the real world" would be easier. The truth is, I am scared. I am scared of never reaching my dreams, or of the fact that maybe I don't know what those are right now. I'm scared of never knowing love in all its potential. I am scared of failing. For the first time in my life I fear my future. Then I have a reality check... He's carried me all of my life. Through the best of times and through the worst. I've made it. I'm alive and have all of my limbs. No, things are not the way I imagined them. I'm not out changing the world today like I want to, and maybe the time I've had to spend with my little brother this week wasn't what I thought success would be, but would I honestly trade it for the world? The truth is, I know full well that even in those times when I feel so very alone- I am still surrounded with more love than I even realize. This is my life- I am going to do my best to make the very most of it. If it is alot of little things or a few big things- it is what I make of it and what I allow God to do through me. Its the constant struggle of trusting God with my unknown.. I want Him to win!!