I have what I have.. but I'm giving it up.

I have once again learned this life is not about me. A lesson that takes looking outside myself and straight into the hearts and the needs of others. This is not the first time I have come across this "divine" revelation. In fact, God has had to remind me of this more times than I think He'd have liked to. I sit here, content, happy, and just full of hope... in spite of the fact that I have no idea what God wants to do with my life.. But I need to know... There is no doubt that my time in Spain changed me... My eyes were certainly opened to a world so much bigger than the one I've known for the past 21 years. My heart yearns to pour what I have and know into others. I do love being home. I find the comforts I have here refreshing..but...maybe not necessary.. I love my family and my friends more than words could possibly describe... but what if there are more that I'm supposed to love? I can't help but feel if I don't give my entire life to this destiny.. to this call on my life (whatever that may be) that at the end of it all I'll feel like Its been a waste... I have a burden.. I have a heart.. I have the capability... so.. I seek direction.. I don't know that this is an overnight process.. it may take time.. I may need to be patient.. But I know one thing.. If I don't fulfill God's purpose for my life anything I do will be empty and lonely.